Life Doesn’t Always Go As Planned

I started this blog back in 2009, I remember the day I pushed publish on my very first post.  Seems like FOREVER ago.  Building Our Story was a journal for me way before it became a business.  I shared some of our family’s biggest announcements, happenings and heartbreaks.  This includes trying to get pregnant, home remodeling, new jobs, babies, major health scares, traveling and so much more.   You all have been there for us, while Building Our Story.  While this “Life Doesn’t Always Go As Planned” post is really hard for me to write, I want to share this family change with you as well.  

Life Doesn’t Always Go As Planned

When I married Jeremy in 2003, we had plans of growing old together.  Looking to the future, I knew that we would build a life we loved and would enjoy together.  I never in a million years would have guessed that this plan wouldn’t work out…but, here we are.  Most of 2019 and 2020 has been life changing and probably the hardest 9 months of my life.  A number of you have messaged me to ask about our marriage and if Jeremy is healthy, which is why I feel the need to give you all a brief update.  

Yes, Jeremy is healthy, thankfully the surgery he had years ago removed the diagnosis of Ulcerative Colitis from his medical conditions.  But, as some of you have figured out, yes, we are divorced.  Honestly, typing or saying that word still takes my breath away.  To know that Jeremy is now my ex-husband and my “children’s dad” rather than my husband is unbelievable to me, still.  While we have been separated since August of 2019, our divorce is rather fresh…February.  

How Are We Doing?

Jude and Teagan are doing okay.  They are still processing our new normal and it hasn’t been easy.  We have mutually decided to have them both in therapy in hopes of making this new life and transition a bit easier on them.  I do think it is helping them but clearly the status of the current situation our world is dealing with is making this transition even harder.  It is clear that they are both grieving a life they once knew. 

I cannot answer for Jeremy but for me, I have my ups and downs.  I am human and I have my good and bad days…along with some SUPER bad days.  Trauma response to betrayal and loss of life as you know it, is REAL.  It is debilitating and I wouldn’t wish those trauma responses on my worst enemy.  I too, feel like I am grieving.  I am grieving a loss of my life, I am grieving the loss of a whole other family (in laws) and I am grieving my husband. While I would have never asked for this to be the way for me to realize how strong of a person I am, this situation has shown me in many different ways that I am a stronger person than I ever imagined.  But in the same breath, it has allowed me to ask for help and rely on my family and friends.  Divorce (ugh, that word) is full of teachable moments that is for sure.   

I am also in therapy and working on this process with my therapist along with some other big and deep issues that I should have been dealing with years ago.  My advice….GO TO THERAPY!! 

What Happens To “Building Our Story”

Well, Building Our Story hit 10 years last September and I am here to announce that I am not going anywhere.  I adore this space and frankly, I NEED this space.  Building Our Story will start changing a bit; for example, now Building Our Story consists of the kids and me and in the future I hope to add some information for those going through divorce and transitions into single parenting and co-parenting.  I am not an expert by any means but I know that during my darkest hours I was searching for someone to tell me I am not alone.  I want to be that person for someone else. 

In terms of changing what is already on Building Our Story – unless I am asked by other parties to remove posts and content, I will be leaving our “Building Our Story” progression on the website.  The truth is, as much as this new plan hurts, the past is what built our family.  You will begin to see some small updates to my “about me” and “media kit” pages but other than that, no updates of past content is planned. 

Thank You!

I know I say it a lot but THANK YOU!  Thank you for being here, thank you for following along in our journey and thank you for your support.  As you know, this is my business now and is now the income that I use to feed my kiddos and pay my bills.  Every click, pageview, social media share or shout out helps!  

I sat on this post for a long time and with every message I got from you, my readers, I knew that I had to clear the air and be honest and authentic with you because that is what I want my website to be! Honest, real and authentic.  Thank you for your continued support, love and prayers.  We need it all.  Stay well and watch me continue Building Our Story!!  

Other Articles Covering Divorce That Might Interest You:

Life Doesn’t Always Go As Planned 
Tips and Tricks For Becoming A Single Income Family
Divorce Recovery – Everyone’s Path Looks Different
Divorce and Surviving The Holidays Without Your Kids