2013 Book Review #3: “Happiest Toddler on the Block” By Harvey Karp

2013 Book Review #3: 
“Happiest Toddler on the Block”
 By Harvey Karp

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My Review:

I decided to pick up “Happiest Toddler on the Block” after a really rough day with Jude.  That evening I downloaded the book to my nook and began reading.  I read “The Happiest Baby on the Block” when Jude was just 2 months old and I loved it.  I share this book with expecting parents because I loved it so much.  So I didn’t hesitate to buy this one for our growing Toddler. 

Karp gets it right – we are dealing with primitive cave people when dealing with Toddlers.  This imagine has not left my brain when I look at Jude now, especially when he is in one of his “moods”.  Jude is a typical caveman Toddler.  Knowing that makes me feel better too.  Just knowing that we are not the only parents out in this world dealing with the hitting, screaming, fighting, crying and NOs makes it feel a little better!  Not that it makes it any easier in the moment. 

I liked this book, however, I feel like I related to the “Happiest Baby on the Block” more than this particular book. I was able to walk away from this book with some helpful tips and considerations though.

Mostly what I am remembering to do with Jude now is talk in shorter phrases when trying to stop a behavior.  Jude is VERY advanced with his vocabulary and talking which means it is hard for me to remember that I cannot talk to a 2 year old like you would talk to a 5 year old.  So I am consciously thinking about the words that come out of my mouth when redirecting him now. 

Example: “NO! That hurts the kitty!”  Or “No! Hitting is not ok!”  I do not explain what I am feeling – just stating the obvious! 

Karp does this weird Toddlerese thing in the book and I cannot do it.  He really wants you to speak to your Toddler like they are babies.  At least that is what I feel like it sounds like.  I decided that I cannot digress with our language we use with Jude but instead keep it straight forward.  I am not a fan of the STOMPING, CLAPPING and YELLING with your child as I feel like that will only make Jude copy what I am doing.  Maybe when he is a couple years older that will work because he will see and understand how ridiculous he looks throwing a fit if I am copying his movements. 

I do like the Fast Food Talk that Karp introduces.  Jeremy and I used this method in our Marriage Counseling before we were married.  We called it THE FLOOR though.  Same thing – repeating what is being said.  Showing your Toddler that yes you hear that he is upset and mad.  Not discounting his/her feelings. I am trying really hard to use this.  I use the phrase “You are okay!” with Jude A LOT!  Now looking at things from a little Caveman’s perspective I am sure that really pisses him off.  He doesn’t feel like it is okay so why would Mommy be telling him IT IS OKAY? 

We are trying to curb his behaviors so that we can all make it through these lovely Caveman years in one piece.  It is going to be a long ride but I do believe that these techniques are helping us.  Along with these techniques/tips and his sticker chart Jude really has had more good days than bad days!   

My Recommendations:

This book is ideal for anyone dealing with a Toddler that needs redirection often.  But also for anyone questioning if they are the only parents dealing with RED LIGHT Behaviors. 

Read this with an open mind.  Do not put it down when you feel like you couldn’t do some of the techniques.  Instead modify to what you are comfortable with or what you know will help your Toddler.

My Rating:

 

What I’m Reading Now:

Two For the Dough by Janet Evanonich